You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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