Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
