I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
