Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
