4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
