Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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