Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
and she was petting her beer can
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
