i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
