after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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