I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
