i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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