you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize