The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
