i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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