I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
