the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
