since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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