fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
