I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
