The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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