how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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