fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
