Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
