i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
