What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
