you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
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