Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I believe in your delicious
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
