whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
BRING THE BAGELS
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
