You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
