I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
