WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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