why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
