My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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