she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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