Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
