dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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