So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
