did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
