i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
