There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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