Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
