Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
