My hair reeks of homosexuality.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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