i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
