What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
