I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
it's not cheating when I paid for it
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
