He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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