$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
