Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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