I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
